


God Is Kind Of An A-Hole

by Baibaba



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-11
Updated: 2012-04-11
Packaged: 2017-11-03 10:53:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/380603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baibaba/pseuds/Baibaba
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chuck Shurley once had his life planned out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	God Is Kind Of An A-Hole

 

Chuck Shurley once had his life planned out.

He was going to grow up. He was going to meet a kind man and fall madly in love. They were then going to adopt a few children who looked nothing like either of them and he would name the first after his father, George Marion Shurley. George had fought in the Vietnam War, just like his own father, Charles George Shurley who had fought in World War II. George killed himself a day after Chuck’s seventh birthday.

George had been a good father when he had been both sober and his marbles had been in the correct order. Sometimes those two factors didn’t always overlap.

This isn’t important.

No, Chuck had his life laid out and he had a plan to make himself happy and to never be lonely. Family would surround him and he would love them and they would love him and it would all be absolutely wonderful. This was his goal.

Then God started talking to him and things changed. He had gone to psychiatrists because a booming voice was suddenly chatting him up in his head and that was a huge cause for concern. There was nothing wrong though, nothing the doctors could find. The medication didn’t help either. The voice was still there.

So he holed himself in his home with only ‘God’ to keep him company. The house he had bought two years prior because his future family would need rooms to make their own.

God talked about a lot of things.

Now, Chuck was never religious. His mother was Catholic and attended church every day, not just Sunday. She was devout. Most of his memories of her included rosary beads being passed through long and quick fingers only a mother could have. She kept them under her pillow while she slept. She read him The Book of Genesis every night. His dreams would star concubines and Isaac.

His father had lost his faith after the war. George had proclaimed to him, when Chuck’s mother had gone out _somewhere_ that God didn’t exist. God was a pipedream. God was hope for the stupid and the dumb. God was an idea that leads to death and misery. God killed children and innocents.

The God in Chuck’s head seemed nice, if just a little too loud. This God told Chuck that he could make a difference, he could save lives, and he could _help_ God.

Helping God? If God existed, and Chuck had truly wanted to believe there was some almighty being that had a plan for them, then God shouldn’t need help.

So Chuck said ‘no’. He said ‘no’ a lot. He said ‘Hell no’ one time which made God laugh. God had nice laugh.

God talked about Eve and how she was a small girl in Africa who stole a pot full of grain for her family. Eve was killed for it and she was buried under the hot sun. Her family had eaten though. God had liked Eve.

God talked about the angels. His first children who left Earth for the humans because they were too bright and they would have killed the animals and the humans. Lucifer never got over the move. Many of the angels miss the feel of dirt and the push of wind. It was heartbreaking and morbid how Chuck began to believe and enjoy the stories from the voice in his head.

Then Jacob died.

Jacob was his neighbor and they had talked and visited a few times. Jacob was tall and blonde. He was sweet and didn’t seem to mind that Chuck had God in his head. They had kissed once and it had been beautiful, his stubble had caressed Chuck’s beard. For one moment Chuck had gotten back on track. He loved and he had love.

Jacob died in a car accident, a drunk driver. Chuck didn’t attend the funeral, instead he said ‘yes’. He didn’t want to be George.

Being possessed by God is painful if not excruciatingly terrifying. The world turned into a kaleidoscope and Chuck became prisoner in his own head, unable to move and deaf and blind.  It felt like taking one long breath, filling him not with air, but Arctic water.

When he finally exhaled, he could move his own arms and he could finally see. The sounds of the world rushed through him. The newspapers told him years had passed. Apparently God liked to collect them and had stored hundreds of papers in the basement or maybe God had thought Chuck would want to read them when he got his body back. Chuck threw them all out.

The bottles of liquor filled the upper floors, scattered through the rooms where his family was supposed to live. He would never have guessed God liked to drink, but then he never thought God had to possess someone. God was full of surprises. He threw all those out too.

The _Supernatural_ books lined up on his desk were horrifying. The files on his computer told him that he had written the novels. He read them with trepidation, slowly turning the pages because every word was the word of God and just as brutal as the stories from the Bible his mother had read to him.

Three days later he finished the last novel and had moved onto the files on his computer. They went passed what had been published by ‘Carver Edlund’ and into a world of angelic politics. He cried for Ellen and Jo who had given themselves to the cause. He mourned for Dean and Sam Winchester. He felt a kinship for Jimmy Novak.

But the biggest surprise God had left him wasn’t the liquor store in his own home nor was it the books and the royalty checks. It was the note on the very last file underneath the final lines of Dean sitting in the Impala lost and heartbroken, alone.

Chuck read with the flourish of God’s own voice

_“You have a child. He is our child. He is the Son of God and Chuck Marion Shurley. Find him.”_


End file.
